Do you believe that? Im not a very patient person. i dont even like to buy things online, because I like the instant gratification you get when you get to take home what you bought. So I definately struggle with believing this.
One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life. ~Chinese Proverb
When I get impatient, I tend to act instead of letting things happen on thier own, and more times than not, I bring havoc to a situation. I later realize, that if I wouldve been patient, things wouldve worked themselves out, and even in my favor. So I have been trying to learn from my mistakes. But in some instances, its really hard to be patient! I put so much energy and attention into something with no reward. So how do you know the difference between "good things" will eventually come, and wasting your time?
Monday, March 29, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Questions
Our faith in God often hinges on his activity - or - inactivity - in our daily experiences. When our prayers are answered, our faith soars. When God is silent, it becomes harder to trust him.
A recent string of events has really put my faith to the test. I whole heartedly relate to the above statement. When life is good, its so easy to speak Gods praise, but when bad things happen, I struggle to "keep the faith"
Reminds me of this song, Before the Morning. And I have to constantly remind myself of the words Josh Wilson sings.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MniOtRnCO9I
The story behind this song is amazing and very touching, and would recommend checking it out www.beforethemorning.net
I know that eventually, good will come from it all, but how soon will that be, and how much more do you have to go through to get there? I guess instead of focusing on the end result, maybe I should try to focus on the "right now" and be thankful for the good and not dwell on the negative. Its hard to see the bigger picture sometimes.
And while Im on this subject of questions.....
Do you ever wonder why God puts someone in your life? Its kind of funny to recall the events of meeting a certain person (for the sake of my pride lol, we will call my friend Jo) and the setbacks that have come along in our friendship. And, on most days, we have a pretty good friendship. Until recently when it seems to all be a little jumbled. I try really hard to do the right thing, and the right thing always seems to be in favor of Jo. But I want to keep things simple and uncomplicated as much as possible. And Im stuck here with this empty feeling. So, I have my daily conversation with God, and ask Him why Jo is in my life. And, it never fails, even if I havent heard from Jo in days, and my attempts to talk to Jo have been ignored, I, out of no where, will hear from them. Its a constant reminder from God, that, no matter what I may think, or even what my friend may think, theres a reason they came into my life. I guess I should really just learn patience, and remember that its all in Gods hands.
A recent string of events has really put my faith to the test. I whole heartedly relate to the above statement. When life is good, its so easy to speak Gods praise, but when bad things happen, I struggle to "keep the faith"
Reminds me of this song, Before the Morning. And I have to constantly remind myself of the words Josh Wilson sings.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MniOtRnCO9I
The story behind this song is amazing and very touching, and would recommend checking it out www.beforethemorning.net
I know that eventually, good will come from it all, but how soon will that be, and how much more do you have to go through to get there? I guess instead of focusing on the end result, maybe I should try to focus on the "right now" and be thankful for the good and not dwell on the negative. Its hard to see the bigger picture sometimes.
And while Im on this subject of questions.....
Do you ever wonder why God puts someone in your life? Its kind of funny to recall the events of meeting a certain person (for the sake of my pride lol, we will call my friend Jo) and the setbacks that have come along in our friendship. And, on most days, we have a pretty good friendship. Until recently when it seems to all be a little jumbled. I try really hard to do the right thing, and the right thing always seems to be in favor of Jo. But I want to keep things simple and uncomplicated as much as possible. And Im stuck here with this empty feeling. So, I have my daily conversation with God, and ask Him why Jo is in my life. And, it never fails, even if I havent heard from Jo in days, and my attempts to talk to Jo have been ignored, I, out of no where, will hear from them. Its a constant reminder from God, that, no matter what I may think, or even what my friend may think, theres a reason they came into my life. I guess I should really just learn patience, and remember that its all in Gods hands.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Remember those nights when I had nothing to do...
Ahhh. I miss those days. I dont know when it happened, But I somewhere developed something that resembles a LIFE. And Im not sure how I feel about that. I enjoy having stuff to do, but I miss being able to sit at home and relax. Between Emmas dance class on tuesday, my church group wednesday (soon to change to wednesday AND monday) every other week I meet Emmas dad in Arkansas AFTER I get off work, we have our girls day brunch (me, mom, sis, melissa, and the girls) every saturday, I work in the nursery at church on sundays. And not to mention things that come up on the days we dont have set obligations. Endless "Insert Home Business Name here" Parties, I still have my bow business going strong, birthday parties, showers, family time.......When does it end? My mom says Im stretching myself too thin, but theres no way Im giving up Emmas dance class. She absolutely LOVES it Nor will I give up any of my church activities. I look forward to them every week, and it really makes me feel blessed I am able to serve God in so many ways. I think I need to learn to tell people no every now and then. Thats something that I dont know how to do.
On not much of a lighter note......
Kanen goes to court Wednesday. I have been trying to mentally prepare myself for whatever is thrown at me after he finds out what is going to happen. Im sure whatever the outcome, Im going to hear about it. Hopefully all this wil be over very soon. I dont know about you, but Im ready to move past it!
This past Saturday night, I finally got my tattoo fixed. Ive waited for 7 years to decide to do it. And trust someone to do it. I got my first tattoo when I turned 18. And just kind of because I could lol. It has NO meaning at all to me. I dont really like it, and it was very poorly done on top of that. So, after much thought, I decided it was worth it to me to get it fixed and get something that I really liked. It hurt like hell. I dont remember it hurting at all the first time to be honest. Which is porbably part of the reason I was so on board for doing it again lol. My sister went with me., Which was fun to experience with her. She laughed at me the whole time, but was a good source of support (i use that term very lightly in this case lol) I absolutely love it now. The original tatto is still there, but there is more to it, and color, and 2 smaller butterflies (one for each girl). I am very happy with what he was able to do to it.
On not much of a lighter note......
Kanen goes to court Wednesday. I have been trying to mentally prepare myself for whatever is thrown at me after he finds out what is going to happen. Im sure whatever the outcome, Im going to hear about it. Hopefully all this wil be over very soon. I dont know about you, but Im ready to move past it!
This past Saturday night, I finally got my tattoo fixed. Ive waited for 7 years to decide to do it. And trust someone to do it. I got my first tattoo when I turned 18. And just kind of because I could lol. It has NO meaning at all to me. I dont really like it, and it was very poorly done on top of that. So, after much thought, I decided it was worth it to me to get it fixed and get something that I really liked. It hurt like hell. I dont remember it hurting at all the first time to be honest. Which is porbably part of the reason I was so on board for doing it again lol. My sister went with me., Which was fun to experience with her. She laughed at me the whole time, but was a good source of support (i use that term very lightly in this case lol) I absolutely love it now. The original tatto is still there, but there is more to it, and color, and 2 smaller butterflies (one for each girl). I am very happy with what he was able to do to it.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Playing catch up
2 months later, I think its time to fill you in on my Church happenings :p
I really got a lot out of our NPCU wednesday night class. I missed a couple classes though so I am retaking it the second time. I also dont think I opened up as much as I could have, mainly because Kanens mom was my group leader. A lot of my issues either involve her, or she is directly associated with them. So I am really looking forward to going through all of it again with a chance to really use the tools that are given to me. I am also one of the group leaders for the women this class, I am so excited to have that opportunity, and hopefully do my job of making everyone feel welcome and comfortable to open up.
Our wednesday night group of women that have continued to meet, has been so amazing. They are all such wonderful ladies! I have been really blessed with a great support system. We have a blast together, and its so nice to just be able to vent and talk about your problems without anyone judging you. Each and every one of them is genuine when they listen and offer support. Its a great thing! I hope they realize how much having them around means to me!
I am still volunteering in the nursery. It gives me my baby fix lol. I am also starting to train for team leader this Sunday, which Im very happy about!
Our Church has this amazing outreach program called 2nd saturday. They go out into the community to help fight "Global Giants" Disease, Poverty, Illiteracy, and Spiritual Emptiness. Its incredible what gets accomplished on these days. The past Saturday, they invited women from The Family Violence Center, Aids Project of the Ozarks, and single and widowed moms from the community for a day of pampering and beauty. At first, I volunteered to help, but NPC staff brought it to my attention that this day was for me too :) So me and the girls got to join in the fun. I got my hair and makeup done. The girls and I had a fun photo shoot, we had brunch, and there was even a carnival for the girls. It was a great time. And to see all the women there, with thier children, looking beautiful and feeling special was a really moving experience. Its crazy to think such a small gesture as making a mom feel like the center of attention for one day, can have such an impact on her. And for one day, no one was judgemental, or mean, or hurtful towards them. I could over hear stories of heartbreak and hurt they were telling thier "host". And how great they thought it was that a church would open thier doors to people society has cast out and make them feel welcome. It made me so proud to be part of such an amazing day, and such an INSPIRATIONAL and INTENTIONAL Church. Thank you North Point for allowing me to be part of a life changing day!
I really got a lot out of our NPCU wednesday night class. I missed a couple classes though so I am retaking it the second time. I also dont think I opened up as much as I could have, mainly because Kanens mom was my group leader. A lot of my issues either involve her, or she is directly associated with them. So I am really looking forward to going through all of it again with a chance to really use the tools that are given to me. I am also one of the group leaders for the women this class, I am so excited to have that opportunity, and hopefully do my job of making everyone feel welcome and comfortable to open up.
Our wednesday night group of women that have continued to meet, has been so amazing. They are all such wonderful ladies! I have been really blessed with a great support system. We have a blast together, and its so nice to just be able to vent and talk about your problems without anyone judging you. Each and every one of them is genuine when they listen and offer support. Its a great thing! I hope they realize how much having them around means to me!
I am still volunteering in the nursery. It gives me my baby fix lol. I am also starting to train for team leader this Sunday, which Im very happy about!
Our Church has this amazing outreach program called 2nd saturday. They go out into the community to help fight "Global Giants" Disease, Poverty, Illiteracy, and Spiritual Emptiness. Its incredible what gets accomplished on these days. The past Saturday, they invited women from The Family Violence Center, Aids Project of the Ozarks, and single and widowed moms from the community for a day of pampering and beauty. At first, I volunteered to help, but NPC staff brought it to my attention that this day was for me too :) So me and the girls got to join in the fun. I got my hair and makeup done. The girls and I had a fun photo shoot, we had brunch, and there was even a carnival for the girls. It was a great time. And to see all the women there, with thier children, looking beautiful and feeling special was a really moving experience. Its crazy to think such a small gesture as making a mom feel like the center of attention for one day, can have such an impact on her. And for one day, no one was judgemental, or mean, or hurtful towards them. I could over hear stories of heartbreak and hurt they were telling thier "host". And how great they thought it was that a church would open thier doors to people society has cast out and make them feel welcome. It made me so proud to be part of such an amazing day, and such an INSPIRATIONAL and INTENTIONAL Church. Thank you North Point for allowing me to be part of a life changing day!
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